The silence of no thought
It speaks with increasing volume
Enticing me . . .
“Wanna figure it out?”
“No thought”
“Wanna change?”
“No thought”
“Wanna create?”
“No thought”
“Wanna love?”
“No thought”
“Wanna live well?”
“No thought”
“Wanna die well?”
“No thought”
In this silence, the song rises in my heart again
And I am made new.
As I continue “Just Sitting” – my Zazen practice – I remain intrigued by what it’s doing, yet at the same time trying to be unattached from expectation that anything will come of it. This simple (and not so simple!) opening of the body, spirit and mind connects us directly to Source Energy, God, Spirit and when you think about it, that’s freak’n amazing!! I find myself more aware, looking to see what this silence will bring.
Most of the time I find it difficult not to think, and simply concentrate on my breathing. The mind, the ego will not easily shut up. It does NOT want to give up control! Yet, what a relief it is to stop the incessant chatter within! I can only imagine what this must do to the brain. I can’t help but believe that in the process of this silence of the mind, the brain is literally making new connections. I am convinced that in this silence I am more lined up with Source, and Divine will becomes my will. In this silence the ego is shut up and I somehow feel more directly connected to God – I let go of control. I get out of the way. Maybe that’s what “let go, and let God” means. Normally when I give up control, I find myself, at least apprehensive, if not downright fearful. Yet as a result of this silence I find myself looking forward in hopeful expectation to see what will unfold in my life – and that of the world (because it‘s not just about my life, but affecting the world). Instead of a problem to be solved, life is becoming a Mystery to be lived. I look forward to the journey!
The other day I was made aware of a movie called “Into Great Silence.” It is a documentary film directed by Phillip Groning which portrays the lives of the Carthusian Monks of the Grande Charteuse Monastery high in the French Alps. It’s known to be one of the most austere monasteries. I imagine that many people might be bored out of their minds by this movie, as it definitely takes one “into great silence,” as its title suggests. The movie is around two and a half hours long and most of it is silence. It simply shows the monks in their day to day lives – without offering commentary or explanation. These monks do not talk, except when they are in common prayer and once a week after a meal on Sundays. So it’s quiet! Disturbingly so! Yet, . . . Refreshingly so. Talk about counter-cultural!
After watching this movie I wondered how much we may all be seduced away from the silence by the incessant, and sometimes, unnoticeable noise all around us. I wonder if all the noise that surrounds us, or that we choose to be surrounded by – lulls us into a dull sense of living, and ultimately – in our society – a crisis of meaning.
When I enter into the silence, which is initially disturbing, I am lead to a greater sense of myself, a more peaceful place and, in the process, I become a more compassionate presence in the world. It is nothing short of hard work to stay with silence, but I am becoming more and more conscious of the tremendous difference it makes in my life and work. I feel as if I am slowly being seduced by it. In entering the silence I give up control to a Higher Power, which is initially disturbing. But now I am intrigued by it, curious and interested to see what happens. And something is happening. I don’t quite know what it is, but I know it’s good.
Today I was meditating, and, as often is the case, my mind gets going and I want to get up and start getting something done that I’m thinking about. Sometimes it is “work” just to sit there. Funny huh? “Work” just to sit there?
The White Robed Monks call this “Just Sitting,” a practice adopted from Zen, where one simply sits 15 minutes a day, concentrating on the breath and clearing the mind of all thought. When we do this our mind, our ego revolts. That little voice in our heads just doesn’t want to leave us alone.
What struck me this morning again is that when I want to heed that voice within, when I want to get up and start moving and stop this sitting – I am not trusting! In essence, when I break the meditation and start running, I am saying that I trust more in myself than I do in Divine Power. My experience, however, says that when I stay with this “work,” when I simply sit and make an empty space in my mind, I connect directly with Source Energy, God, the Spirit. Suddenly my work is given energy and much more is accomplished – and somehow – directly as a result of thinking no-thing, my thoughts are clarified and my life is given meaning and direction. It’s like I have suddenly been plugged in!
Can I trust enough to stay with the silent embrace and make a space in my life to connect with Source? Try it. And see what happens!
“If only you had known the path to peace this day; but you have completely lost it from your view.” (See Luke 19: 41-44)
What gives you peace? What are the practices that keep you in a peaceful place? What are those things that you do, even when you don’t want to, but you know that if you do them, you will be in a better space?
How easy it is to loose the path to peace, to drop those actions and activities that keep us focused and centered. It could be skimping on our time for meditation, or exercise, suddenly getting into a pattern of not eating right, watching too much TV and doing too little reading, spending more time on the internet than interacting with people.
I cannot tell you how often I have heard someone in a 12 Step Meeting say that they did not want to come today, that they had to drag themselves there – but they felt so good that they had!
Sometimes we don’t FEEL like doing the things that keep us in a good, peaceful place and we have to force ourselves to do them. Making this effort is well worth it, for in the long run, getting off our butts and doing something that we know will make us feel better is a good investment of our time.
There is a still place within all of us to which we can retreat, no matter what is going on around us or within us. Like the ocean, that on the surface can be tossed about violently in a storm, if we go deeper the waters become calm and still.
I believe this is what Viktor Frankl speaks of, in the midst of his experience in a Nazi concentration camp. This is what Eckhart Tolle speaks of when he describes the place of Being beyond the incessant chatter of the ego mind.
The good news is, we all can go to this still place within. We need not stay on the surface waters of any storm in our lives, but we have a key, a secret place to which we can retreat!
Last night I was awakened suddenly and my mind immediately began to whirl with various concerns, both personal, national and global. I lay, tossing and turning for about an hour. Then I remembered this still place within; and as I visualized myself going deeper, to the place of Being beyond the chatter of the mind, I slowly fell off to sleep again.
We have the key. We know the secret. We just need to become conscious of it and use it!
Matthew 8: 23-27
In this story Jesus remains calmly asleep in the midst of a large storm that is almost sinking the boat he is on. He says to his frightened disciples: “Where is your courage? How little faith you have!”
How easy it is for us to get buffeted by the storms that come at us in life! How easy it is for us to get upset when a personal storm comes upon us or at the stormy and very uncertain state of affairs in our world! Most of the time in the midst of such storms, instead of sleeping calmly, we find it hard to sleep! Instead of getting swept up in the frenzy of the storm, I need to take some time to focus my thoughts away from what is so negative and bothersome, to a positive solution or outcome, aka, “faith.” Unfortunately, I oftentimes think that such “positive thinking” is just hokey!
Recently I buried the wife of a guy I know. He is known in the community as an eternal optimist, always looking at the bright side of things and never on the negative. Even in his wife’s dying he remained optimistic as he firmly believed she was headed to a better place. He seems to be getting on with life as he has in the past, maintaining a vibrant smile and a good word for those he meets in everyday life. I think he is able to handle this event in his life precisely because, in the past, on a daily basis, he has chosen to look at what is positive in life. He refuses to concentrate on the negative. And this behavior, which is now a deep rooted habit, is the source of calm energy in the midst of the storms of his life.
In the midst of whatever storm is going on in my life or the world, can I shift my focus of attention to what is positive?
In the silence of the morning
The dew kissed rose
Awakens to the light
And in its velvet red light
My spirit is made present
The pain and worries of the past
Seemingly insurmountable at the time
Seem now a distant memory
This rose
Only a few weeks ago
Seemingly dead in its Winter
Now bursts forth with life
This rose
Of no practical use
Simply in its being
Speaks to my heart
Fear not
The dead of your Winter
Will soon burst forth
To the light of a new Spring
The chatter of the mind
The voices that disturb the serenity of the soul
The incessant images of concerns displayed like
Flashing images on a TV Screen
The impatience of ego’s desire: I want it NOW!
Divine peace in the midst of the mind’s storm:
Chill out! It’s on its way!
Surrender to its appointed time, . . . And live.
And this peace, beyond ego‘s capacity to bestow,
Opens the door to Presence – the portal to Future’s bliss!
John 14: 27-31
“Peace is my farewell to you, my peace is my gift to you.”
The peace that the Christ speaks of, I believe, is a sense of peace that one has within. All hell could be breaking loose, yet we still can have peace within. No matter what is happening in our lives or our world that is upsetting, we all can go to an inner place of silence. Eckhart Tolle describes this well in his book The New Earth when he speaks about the ego and how the ego can get all agitated about this or that; but it’s all fleeting. It’s all an illusion. Days, weeks or months later, the upset, whatever it was, is a distant memory and we find ourselves smiling again. The trick is to realize, PRECISELY IN THE MIDST OF THE UPSET, that this is an illusion, that in the future this will pass. In radically accepting the present moment as it is, we open ourselves to an energy and a stream of life that is much deeper. It’s like a storm on the ocean. The surface waters could be all churned up, but if we go deeper we will find a place of calm.
Easier said than done hugh? Indeed!
Sometimes we just have to trudge through the muck, but realize, at least in our minds, this this will pass. However, I believe that if we make attempts to go to that place of inner silence we will begin to experience the place of calm in the midst of the storm. Sometimes this entails doing something different, out of our normal routine - like going to a different place that takes us out of the norm and opens the door to a different vista within. Whatever it is that we do to get to that place of inner calm, we must DO something. In taking even one small step we will begin to feel empowered and less of a victim of life’s circumstances.
