Amazing Divine Synchronicity August 13, 2009
Posted by theguyoutsidethewalls in 12 Step Spirituality, Detachment.Tags: 12 Steps, Bible, Christianity, Detachment, Gay, Gay Catholic, Gay Christian, Judgment, Love, Relationships, Religion, Spirituality
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I have been struggling with the re-emergence of a guy in my life that I once had deep feelings for. I have been struggling with the way he is living his life. I am no saint, by any means; but after many years of not being in touch, to hear of the way he is living and justifying his life surprises me.
In the midst of this struggle, I opened to a daily reading. It was from Teresa of Avila’s “Interior Castle” and this is what it said: “Let us look at our own shortcomings and leave other’s alone. . . . There is no reason why we should expect everyone else to travel by our own road, and we should not attempt to point them to the spiritual path when perhaps we don’t know what it is.”
I looked up and laughed, amazed at Divine Synchronicity. . . . And to think there are times when I have difficulty believing!
Teresa goes on to say that we might learn important lessons from the people who shock us. Indeed, it may help define more clearly what is life giving to us and who we are.
Get the focus off of him; and get it back on yourself and what you need to do to live in ways that are life giving for you.
Naked and in the Groove March 2, 2009
Posted by theguyoutsidethewalls in 12 Step Spirituality, Addiction, Change, Lent, Personal Growth.Tags: Catholicism, Change, Christianity, Gay, Gay Catholic, Gay Christian, GLBT, Lent, Love, Personal Growth, Queer, Relationships, Religion, Spirituality
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I recently heard a talk in which the speaker described an animal that had been born in a zoo. After some years they built a multi-million dollar display, simulating the natural habitat for the animal, thinking that it would create a better, happier space for the animal. When it was released into its new space, much to their surprise, it stayed to one small area. It only walked the same path over and over, creating a rut in the ground, which got deeper as time went on. The animal had all this beautiful space, but it stayed in that one little rut and didn’t roam elsewhere! The speaker went on to say: aren’t we like that sometimes? We get in a rut, doing and thinking the same things over and over – missing so much of what could be if we just got out of the rut.
If you’ve read my last couple of meditations, you’ll know that I spoke of Lent as an opportunity to “get naked” to remove the “cloak” that holds us from being more present to life, to others and to God. When we, with the help of a Power greater than ourselves, remove whatever that is and stand naked in life, present, alive and aware – we get outa the rut and into the groove!
Suddenly, we begin to live again! Suddenly we look around and see so much of life around us. We slowly crawl out of that rut and begin, perhaps fearfully at first, to wander out into the beauty that we have been missing. All that beauty, all those people, all those possibilities suddenly open up before us – because we have had the courage to name that which keeps us all bound up, because we have had the courage to call on a Power greater than ourselves to free us.
Have you named the cloak that you need to remove, the cloak that keeps you separated from life, from others and from God? Have you called on a Higher Power to help you, trusting that the help WILL come? Is the cloak beginning to fall away?
Are you getting out of the rut, and into the groove?
In Your Face January 10, 2009
Posted by theguyoutsidethewalls in Correction, Relationships.Tags: Christianity, Correction, Gay, Gay Catholic, Gay Christian, Gay Life, GLBT, Love, Parenting, Relationships, Religion, Spirituality
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Sometimes love demands that we get in someone’s face. When we see someone we love doing something which is harming them, love demands that we say something. Sometimes these words can and need to be strong, . . . but always said in love. If we do not say anything, we fail in love. Again, these words must always be said in love. Parents know this full well when they correct their children and at times forcefully demand a correction of bad behavior. It is out of concern, not simply anger.
As we continue to celebrate light in the midst of darkness, sometimes getting in someone’s face can be a way of lighting the way to a better life for them. Indeed, it is perhaps the most loving thing we can do, yet one of the most difficult. I am grateful for those in my past who have had the courage to get in my face and helped me onward to a new way of living.
Make It Smooth December 9, 2008
Posted by theguyoutsidethewalls in Advent/Christmas, Change, Love, Self Giving.Tags: Advent, Christmas, Gay, Gay Catholic, Gay Christian, GLBT, Holidays, Love, Relationships, Self Giving, Self Improvement, Spirituality
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“Make straight in the wasteland a highway for our God! Every valley shall be filled in, every mountain and hill will be made low. The rugged land shall be made a plain, the rough country, a broad valley.” (See Isaiah 40: 1-11)
We’re so used to good roads in the United States that the concept of making a straight highway and leveling mountains is lost on us. When I lived in Central America for a summer I came to appreciate the roads and highway system we have here unlike I ever have before.
This concept of making a highway for God comes up again and again during Advent. If you’ve had the opportunity to observe a highway being built through hills and mountains, suddenly the awesome task of making a straight road comes into perspective!
This makes me think about the obstacles and “rough places” that are still within me, or the obstacles that I either place in another’s way, or don’t help remove. Think of your partner at home, or another family member or friend. Think of the poor, the less fortunate. How could I be of help in removing some of the obstacles that people have in their lives and making life even a little bit easier for them? And, conversely, what rough places and obstacles are still within me that hinder me from living life just a little more fully?
Presence: Getting Connected December 6, 2008
Posted by theguyoutsidethewalls in Advent/Christmas, Presence.Tags: Advent, Christmas, Gay, Gay Catholic, Gay Christian, gay spirituality, LGBT, Love, Queer, Relationships, Religion, Spirituality
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Presence: Getting Connected
Ever wonder if you were on the right path? Ever feel like you’re off the path? I know when I feel off the path. It’s in those times that I need to pause and take time to be still, to get connected again. If I am not taking that time, the teacher seems to disappear. When I do take the time, the teacher appears. Almost by instinct I begin to know what to do, which way to go and life begins to take on meaning again.
It’s like life with a Partner. Life goes on, we get distracted by daily, mundane tasks and one day goes on the next. If we don’t intentionally take time to communicate or simply be present to our Partner, the relationship gets disconnected, not only for our Partner, but something within ourselves just isn’t quite right. When we take the time to communicate and be present, the path reveals itself and life deepens.
“With your own eyes you shall see your Teacher, while from behind, a voice shall sound in your ears: ‘This is the way. Walk in it.’” (See Isaiah 30: 19-21, 23-26)
Feeling disconnected? Sometimes just taking some time to simply be present to God and/or others makes a big difference. And remember, even when we take time to be present, it doesn’t mean that we’re necessarily going to “feel” connected right away. The important thing is that we take the time to be present. Period.
Perhaps the best present we could give ourselves and others is presence.
Obama’s Dog. What We Can Learn. November 13, 2008
Posted by theguyoutsidethewalls in All Are Welcome, Love, Prejudice.Tags: Dogs, Gay, Gay Catholic, Gay Christian, gay spirituality, Judgment, Love, Prejudice, Religion, Spirituality
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If the dog for some reason would need to be taken out of the White House and given to another family – say, a poor family – it would be blind to the difference in surroundings, the difference in the economis status or importance of the family that it is now living with. It would simply continue to offer love.
Perhaps we all could learn something from our canine friends. Perhaps we could all benefit from removing the filters of judgement ingrained in us and become blind to the differences in people. I know that I would do well to become more like a dog. God knows that I have filters of judgement within me of which I am not even aware; yet they are there. Perhaps today I could begin opening myself to a wider circle of people and, like a dog, welcome whoever walks into the path of my life, no matter their appearance, economic status, belief system, political persuasion, etc.
Duty! November 11, 2008
Posted by theguyoutsidethewalls in Actions Speak, Love.Tags: Gay, Gay Catholic, Gay Christian, gay spirituality, Love, Relationships, Religion, Spirituality
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“We have done no more than our duty.” (Luke 17: 10)
Sometimes love is like that. Sometimes life is like that. It’s not a matter of how we “feel,” or whether or not we’re excited about doing something for someone. Sometimes life and love is just about doing something good WHEN WE DON’T WANT TO, when we DON’T feel like it. In that, one’s love is proven.
Do something for someone today – even though you don’t feel like it.
How Are You Behaving? October 26, 2008
Posted by theguyoutsidethewalls in Actions Speak, Love.Tags: Christianity, Gay, Gay Catholic, Gay Christian, LGBT, Love, Queer, Relationships, Religion, Spirituality
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Exodus 22: 20-26
Matthew 22: 34-40
Notice in Matthew that a scholar of the law posed the question as to which commandment is the greatest, after he found out that Jesus had silenced the Sadducees. He posed it as a test. But notice what Jesus does. He speaks to the great commandment, the great “Hear O Israel, . . . you shall love the Lord your God with your whole heart, soul and mind” But then Jesus combines this commandment with another: “You shall love your neighbor as yourself.” Then he says that the WHOLE LAW is summed up in these commandments. Again, I imagine, the scholar of the law sat silent, unable to contest what Jesus had said.
In Exodus as well as elsewhere, what it means to love is spelled out. Our love of God is to be reflected in our love of others. As a matter of fact, even if someone says they don’t believe in God, but they exhibit love and care for others, they, in fact, are headed in the right direction.
Is the love that I claim to have for God reflected in my actions? If someone didn’t know anything of my “spirituality,” but only observed my behavior – would my spirituality be evident in my actions? Francis of Assisi said: “Preach the Gospel. . . . And when necessary, use words!”
How am I behaving today?
I Want to Say Something to All of You. October 20, 2008
Posted by theguyoutsidethewalls in The Meaning of Life.Tags: Business, Gay, Gay Catholic, Gay Christian, LGBTQ, Love, Meaning of Life, Money, Queer, Relationships, Religion, Spirituality
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Luke 12: 13-21
“Thus will it be for those who store up treasures for themselves, but are not rich in the matters of God.”
Sometimes on the evening News we are given the announcement that this or that movie star or world leader from the past has died. I remember years ago a friend of mine saying “Sic transit gloria mundi!” “Thus passes the glory of the world!”
We think we’re going to be here forever. And so much of our time is swept up in the building of our kingdoms here. In the end, will any of that matter?
Years ago, when I was in High School and falling in love with boys left and right, even though I wouldn’t admit it, there was a song that was sung often during Mass. I went to a Catholic High School, a small, close knit all boys school. This song was often used at graduation Masses. It was published by the Monks of Weston Priory and it’s called “Wherever You Go.” It’s based on that wonderful text from the book of Ruth. “Wherever you go, I will go. Wherever you live, I will live. . . .” In the middle of the two verses of this song was a wonderful spoken part and, if I can remember it correctly, it went something like this:
“I want to say something to all you who have become a part of the fabric of my life. The color and texture which you have brought to my being have become a song and I want to sing it forever. There is an Energy which makes things happen, when the paths of other persons touch ours and we have to be there and let it happen. When the time of our particular sunset comes, our ‘thing,’ our accomplishment won’t really matter. But the clarity and care with which we have loved each other will speak with vitality of the great gift of life that we have been for each other.” (Monks of Weston Priory)
I want to say something to all of you.
I hope and pray that somehow my life, and yours, is not so much caught up in the building of my “thing” or accomplishment, but the building up of you as a person. I hope and pray that the affect that I leave on the world won’t be so much about the size of house I had, how much money I made, how smart I am and how many degrees I have, how big my business has grown, etc. But I hope that the affect I leave on the world will be the spark of vitality and life that I have given to others.
To what are we giving our time?
