Wild Child! October 5, 2008
Posted by theguyoutsidethewalls in Discipline, Personal Growth, Spiritual "Practice".Tags: Centering, Excecise, Gay, Gay Catholic, Gay Christian, gay spirituality, Personal Growth, Religion, Self Help, Spiritual "Practice", Spirituality, Work
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“My friend had a vineyard on a fertile hillside; . . . but what it yielded was wild grapes.” See Isaiah 5: 1-7
Ever feel like you’ve got some wild grapes growing within you? Ever feel like there are some weeds among the wheat that are spouting up?
Lately, I have felt some wild grapes sprouting up, some weeds among the wheat. I have good intentions and then it seems my actions take me in a different direction. I know full well why the wild grapes are growing within. I have not been caring for the inner vineyard lately. I have been a bit lax in my spiritual practice, body care and my loving. I have been letting these things slip ever so slowly to the wayside. And then I wonder why I begin to feel off center, if not WAY off center!?
It is my spiritual practice, my body care and my loving that keep the inner vineyard that is my life healthy, strong and growing. Like a garden, if I don’t continually work at it, the weeds quickly begin to overtake it and the strength and beauty of the good plants begins to fade. I feel that my strength and beauty has faded of late. Sometimes I just need to force myself to do that which keeps me healthy. And when I do, I know that life will again begin to blossom, beauty will return.
My Spiritual Practice – What Works For Me? – Part VI September 6, 2008
Posted by theguyoutsidethewalls in Spiritual "Practice".Tags: Christianity, Ego, Gay, Gay Life, gay spirituality, Gratitude, Inspiration, LGBT, Love, Queer, Religion, Service, Spiritual "Practice", Spirituality, Wayne Dyer
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Service and a Grateful Heart
Two other aspects of spiritual practice that I find helpful are being of service to others and having a grateful heart.
This morning I was listening to Wayne Dyer’s Inspiration: Your Ultimate Calling. I have this on CD and when I’m in the car I like to listen to it. It’s just another way to absorb some good information in the midst of all the garbage! As I drove this morning Wayne spoke of the ego and how the ego tries to distract us, keeping us agitated and grasping after more and more. It feeds on the illusion that we need more, and need to protect what we have or else someone is going to take it from us. Spirit, on the other hand, is infinite and ever giving. Having no sense of lack, but a firm belief that there is infinite abundance, Spirit has no need to protect or hoard. To be like Spirit, our Source, believe that there is abundance and that we will always be taken are of. When we do so we will naturally become more preoccupied with being of service than protecting and hoarding our time or what we have. When we let go and give, we will find that it comes back to us; and then some! So part of good spiritual practice is to be of some service to others. Conversely, I find when I am in a mode where I am totally self absorbed, I lack energy and vibrance.
Finally, maintaining a grateful heart is a part of my spiritual practice that I find helpful. I do this in a simple way that takes about 60 seconds. At the end of each day, right as I get into bed, I take around 60 seconds to become conscious of at least five things that day that I have to be grateful for. I find this, not only a good review of the day, but something which lifts my spirits. Those who have grateful hearts walk through life with a much more positive, happy attitude. Simply by knowing how blessed we are, we become a blessing for others in the positive energy that we radiate.
All of this being said, I am NO saint. I have my ups and downs; my good days and bad. Ask any of my friends who know me well! Yet in the midst of it all, when I maintain some spiritual practice, there is a pervading sense that life has meaning and that I’m going somewhere and somehow contributing to this world.
Whatever your spiritual practice may be, I pray that it is something which gives meaning and energizes your life and relationships.
My Spiritual Practice – What Works For Me? – Part V September 5, 2008
Posted by theguyoutsidethewalls in Spiritual "Practice".Tags: Consciousness, Gay, Gay Catholic, Gay Christian, LGBT, Personal Growth, Queer, Religion, Spiritual "Practice", Spirituality
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Carrying It Through the Day
I once had a spiritual advisor who said to me that I was like a horse at the gates on the Kentucky Derby. Once my meditation was done in the morning, the bell rang and I shot out the gate and God consciousness was left in the dust! I laughed when he said this, but man, was it, and is it ever true! Do you ever experience that? You take time to focus, to meditate, to pray to become more aware of Spirit in your life and the life of the world; then you get up and begin to go about your day and forget about it until the next time you intentionally sit down to meditate again?!
One of the challenges of my spiritual practice is to carry a sense of this Spirit consciousness through my day. I am beginning to get better at it. Sometimes just taking a book that I’ve been reading to work is helpful. I may not pick it up, but when I see it, it’s a reminder. Or perhaps carrying a symbol of some sort in my pocket or around my neck would be a helpful reminder. These are things which might call me to consciousness again, reminding me to watch my thoughts, think positively, to watch the grasping of the ego, to live in the moment, be aware that I’m connected to Something which is infinitely abundant, and not to resist difficulty, but see it as a possibility for growth.
What do you do to stay “conscious” through your day?
My Spiritual Practice. What Works For Me? Part IV September 4, 2008
Posted by theguyoutsidethewalls in Spiritual "Practice".Tags: Chant, Eckhart Tolle, Gay, gay spirituality, Lectio Divinia, LGBT, Meditation, Prayer, Prayer Practices, Queer, Spiritual "Practice", Spiritual Reading, The Power of Now
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Chant-Reading-Prayer
After I meditate and lift up needs that I see, I usually chant a hymn and a psalm from the simple and beautiful chant of the Camaldolese Monks in Big Sur CA. I then spend a bit of time in some spiritual reading. I currently read one of the readings from Vigils in the Benedictine Daily Prayer published by Liturgical Press, Collegeville MN. I also like to do a reading from the Carmelites of Indianapolis’ Companion to the Breviary. I find this book of Morning and Evening Prayer filled with thought provoking readings and prayers and I like their use of inclusive language. Just do a Google search and you’ll be able to find it. There is a one volume version and a two volume version.
Recently I also end my reading with a short passage from Eckhart Tolle’s The Power of Now. I find his insights very, very helpful. I use his book more like a meditation book that daily reminds me of good practice, rather than something that I read at a sitting and then put down. I find myself going back to his book again and again. He also has a nice shorter version out for this pupose called: Practicing the Power of Now: Essential Teachings, Meditations and Exercises from The Power of Now.
Currently, the reason why I read both ancient and modern texts is that I like to compare the wisdom that comes from both. I find that there are many similarities. Good modern sources, like Tolle’s works simply put many much of the wisdom of ancients texts in fresh language and make it accessible to the masses. Of course, as far as ancient texts go I am most familiar with Judeo-Christian texts. However I would like to begin reading other texts such as the Bhagavad Gita, a sacred Hindu text or the Koran.
A brief comment on reading and praying. I know this may sound like a LOT, but it’s not so much about how much is read. The passages are pretty brief. It’s more about reading slowly and with awareness. Christian monks speak of “Lectio Divina,” or Divine Reading – Sacred Reading. It’s simply a practice of reading slowly and with awareness, conscious that these words have Power and are able to change and form us. If a particular line hits me, I STOP and stay with it for a while and let it sink in.
Another word about reading and prayer in general. Don’t overwhelm yourself with a lot of different “things.” Keep it simple, especially at first. Just use some reading that is a thought provoking and life changing and just do a LITTLE each day. Again, a little bit done consistently is better than a lot done sporadically.
I end this time of meditation, prayer and reading with some concluding prayer, usually taken from the intercessions and closing prayer of the day from the Companion to the Breviary.
My Spiritual Practice. What Works For Me? – Part III September 3, 2008
Posted by theguyoutsidethewalls in Spiritual "Practice".Tags: Gay, gay spirituality, LGBT, Meditation, Prayer, Queer, Religion, Spiritual "Practice", Spirituality
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My Routine – Meditation/Prayer
I find a dedicated time for prayer/meditation/reading essential in keeping me focused. We all go about routines that ready us for the day. This is one such routine that spiritually readies me for the day.
Each morning I spend at least 30 minutes in prayer/meditation/reading. I usually start by spending around 10 or 15 minutes in meditation, being attentive to my breathing and getting in touch with what Eckhart Tolle would call the “inner body,” that place of Being that is below the chatter of the mind. Zen Buhddists might call this Zen or Zazen – just sitting, getting to the core of our essence and literally touching right here, right now, what is Eternal and Divine, the Unmanifested within. Tolle describes an exercise of breathing, similar to many forms of meditation. What I like about the way he describes this is his how the breath leads us to connect with the Life Force, or that which is Eternal within us. (See The Power of Now, p, 112)
Spiritual writers through the centuries have spoken of the importance of meditation to open us. It is in such a posture that we become receptive and in tune with a Power that is able to open within us an abundance of life, creativity and healing. It’s really amazing when you think about it. We are literally able to touch the Divine right NOW! Jesus said it this way: “The Kingdom of God is at hand!”
After 10 minutes or so I begin to shift the meditation and begin to call on the Power that I have opened myself to and I raise specific people, world situations or personal desires. I do so AS IF WHAT I AM PRAYING FOR HAS ALREADY BEEN GIVEN. Several influences are evident here: the Power of positive thinking a la Wayne Dyer, The Secret and Jesus who constantly called on people to have faith, to believe. Whatever we may think of these ideas, I have found them helpful in slowly lifting me from a negative way of thinking to a more positive frame of mind and a more lively and palatable sense of belief. All thought is energy and if I keep my thoughts in a positive frame of mind, that is what I will see and experience. And I believe that sending good thoughts to even the most difficult situations in our lives, the lives of our loved ones or our world contains within it Power to change.
My Spiritual Practice – What Works For Me – Part II September 2, 2008
Posted by theguyoutsidethewalls in Spiritual "Practice".Tags: Exercise, Gay, gay spirituality, Religion, Spiritual "Practice", Spirituality, The Body
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My Routine – Exercise
On a typical morning I start by going for a jog or lifting weights, then I spend at least 30 minutes in prayer/meditation and reading.
I purposely mention that I start by going for a jog or lifting weights because an essential part of my spiritual practice is exercise. We are embodied spirits and part of what works for me in my spiritual practice is caring for the body temple. I don’t do the greatest job of it all the time, but I do try to maintain some consistent regimen of exercise. I say “consistent” because I think that’s what’s most important. A trainer that I had once said to me, a little bit done consistently is better than a lot done sporadically.
When I am in a regular routine of exercise of some sort I find myself more relaxed, less stressed, more energetic and spiritually more centered. Meditation and prayer take on a deeper, more conscious awareness. I used to pray and meditate first thing in the morning and then exercise. Recently I reversed this routine and am finding my prayer/meditation is much more focused when I have exercised first. I believe this is the case for two reasons. First, my body is oxygenated and, thus, more alert. Second, and perhaps most importantly, when my exercise is done and out of the way, I am more relaxed and focused in meditation. Why? Because I don’t like exercising! Unlike some who love to exercise, I don’t like it and usually find it a chore. On the other hand I love to pray, meditate and read. So in delaying gratification – doing the chore, the hard part first – I can then settle into what I enjoy more fully. Of course, in order to spend time exercising and in prayer/meditation it means I have to get up earlier. For some, morning may not be a good time. Another part of the day might work better. For me, morning works best. I find that if I don’t do it in the morning, chances are, I am not going to pause in my day to get it done!
What is your exercise routine? Do you see it as a part of your spiritual practice? Of course, if you’re not used to exercising, consult your physician first before beginning any regimen.
My Spiritual Practice. What Works For Me – Part I September 1, 2008
Posted by theguyoutsidethewalls in Love, Spiritual "Practice".Tags: Gay, Gay Catholic, Gay Christian, gay spirituality, LGBT, Love, Queer, Relationships, Religion, Spiritual "Practice", Spirituality
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Sometimes I get the question: What is your spiritual practice? What works for you? So the next couple of days I want to bring you inside my “house” as it were and share with you what my daily practice is looking like these days. I have to say it shifts at various times. One or another element of my practice may become more prominent and other’s fade for a while. The important thing is that there is consistant practice. I find that this makes for a life lived with a sense of purpose and meaning.
First I’d like to start with a general comment. I once had a woman come to me who wanted to know about my spiritual practice. She thought I “hung the moon,” and she had me on a pedestal, claiming that I was this incredibly “spiritual” person who had this close relationship with the Divine that was palatable. She wanted to know what I did to “feel” so close to the Divine. In response to what she said, I just started laughing! I told her in no uncertain terms that I was no more “spiritual” than anywhere else; nor did I walk around with a constant “feeling” of Divine Presence. I was riddled with character defects, just like anyone, I struggled and oftentimes felt a great absence of “feeling” Divine presence.
I say this because to start, I think it’s important to realize that our spiritual practice is not always going to make us “feel” close to Divine Energy or particularly centered. It does help, don’t get me wrong. That’s why we do it! But if the expectation is that when I begin a consistant spiritual practice that I am ALWAYS going to “feel” connected, centered and in Divine Energy, that’s an unrealistic expectation. We will probably have a “honeymoon” period at first, where our spiritual practice does indeed make us feel centered and connected, more peaceful and purposeful – as it should! But I want to make it clear that there are times when I “feel” no connection or place of centeredness. However, the important thing is that I keep practicing.
It’s just like a loving relationship, whether it be with a friend or a partner. When the relationship first starts there’s a tremendous “feeling” of closeness, energy and connectedness with the other person. But we all know that as time goes on the “feeling” wains and the practice of loving, even when I don’t “feel” like it begins. This becomes the test of true love. So I want to begin here, with a caution: just because you’re not “feeling” it doesn’t mean you’re not connected to Love. Just keep doing what you need to do (your practice) to stay on the path.
How Are You “DOING?” May 5, 2008
Posted by theguyoutsidethewalls in Love, Spiritual "Practice".Tags: gay spirituality, Homosexuality, Love, Religion, Spiritual "Practice", Spirituality
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Perhaps it’s because of movies and media or, so called, “Reality TV” that we have this perception that life is supposed to be always exciting and love always romantic and fresh. And if life and love begin to fall short of those expectations, we think something is wrong. The fact is life and love have their ups and downs and much of the time they are fairly ordinary. I believe, we also think that if we are “spiritual” we’re always going to feel connected with Divine Life and Energy. I sometimes run into people who think that they’re failing in their spiritual or love lives because they’re not “feeling” it. Life, love and Spirit are not always about “feeling” so much as “doing.”
I had a spiritual director once who, when I was feeling disconnected or down, said to me, yes, but “how are you doing?” I responded by saying “I just told you, I’m not feeling connected.” He again asked: “Yes, but, how are you DOING?” Exasperated, I responded: “I’m not feeling well, or centered or connected – I just told you!” Then he asked me if I was taking some time in prayer, doing a gratitude list and if I was in some way reaching out to help others. In other words, was I doing those things which keep me on the path? I responded: “Yes, I‘m doing those things.” He responded: “Then you’re DOING just fine!”
It’s not about what I’m “feeling” so much as how I’m “doing.” So often we think that if we’re not “feeling” connected or “feeling” love, something is wrong. We then begin to question the quality of our relationships or of our spiritual life. The fact is, if we’re doing what we need to do each day to be loving and spiritually connected people – even if we don’t “feel” it – we need not fear, . . . we’re DOING just fine!
How are you “doing” today?
