A couple of days ago I had two moments of awareness that connected my past with how and why I was reacting to events in the present. I was having a difficult time understanding why, at times, I suddenly feel very lethargic and lacking in self esteem. I also was grappling with why I react to and withdraw from drama with such vehemence. I became very aware that these two reactions are directly connected to messages that I received as a child from my father and mother. These points of awareness were all I needed to begin moving beyond or above the way I was reacting to a greater place of peace and joy.
Oftentimes we walk through life asleep, unaware of how our past if affecting our present. Many people walk their entire lives blindly replaying messages from their past in their present circumstances. It’s like the movie “Groundhog Day.” We live the same reality over and over and over and over – until one day we wake up and we get the message. Only then can we move on in life! Watch the movie sometime and be aware of this message of waking up.
Eckhart Tolle describes what he calls the “emotional pain body.” He describes it as if it had an existence unto its own. It is that entity which carries the memory of past pain and hurt. In order to survive -as all entities are want to do – it needs to feed on more pain and so it is activated by things that people say or do that suddenly tap those memories. Most of us are unaware of this and so we react and create more pain, reliving the messages from our past and feeding the “pain body” within us. The key to freedom is becoming aware of the “emotional pain body,” aware of why we are reacting so. Once we are able to step outside of our reaction and simply observe the pain body, the connection is broken and we are able to detach (See Eckhart Tolle, The Power of Now: A Guide to Spiritual Enlightenment. Namaste Publishing; New World Library, copyright 1999, pp. 36-39).
Perhaps the next time we find ourselves welling up with some emotional response which takes us from a place of peace within, we need to ask why we are reacting. This point of awareness will lead to a greater place of freedom where we can then rise above the emotional response, detach from feeding the “pain body” and get on with living!