Monthly Archives: July 2009

Raising What Was Left For Dead

Have you ever felt absolutely, utterly lifeless?  Have your choices ever left you wandering in a valley of despair and regret?  Have life circumstances, broken relationships or betrayal ever left you paralyzed and with a sense of utter hopelessness for the future?  Has an addiction ever held you so tightly within its prison walls that you felt no means of escape?

In such times it is difficult to believe in the reality of any Power that could lift us beyond what seems like a living grave. . . . Yet, that is our hope and, frankly, that IS our reality.  There IS a Power that can lift us up.  If I look back on my life experience I see clearly how this Power has raised me to new life on various occasions; and I need to call on this Source again.  Traditional religious language would call this “salvation.”

I try to do it all myself.  Or rather, I get so caught up in paralysis that I do NOTHING.  But once I am able to call upon this Power and DO SOMETHING that will help connect me to It (like prayer, meditation, reading a meditation, etc.) – EVEN IF I DON’T FEEL LIKE IT AND DON’T FEEL A BIT CONNECTED IN THE PROCESS – once I do this Something begins to lift me.

Today as I meditated, I chanted a hymn from the Camaldolese Morning Prayer.  The words of the first verse struck me:

“God’s glory, Christ, our new dawned Day,
In deep compassion for our earth
Has raised what we had left for dead,
And healed what sin* had brought to birth.”

*Read here “weakness, addiction, sickness, brokenness, betrayal, poor choices, etc.”

The Power is there to raise what we had left for dead.


Coming Home

I haven’t written in a very long time, largely due to the fact that I’ve been in the midst of a very stressful process of selling my house and buying another.  In the midst of this drawn out upheaval I have felt very much off center.  In the midst of the mess of boxes and dust all around me my spirit had difficulty finding any sense of equilibrium.  Now that things are pretty much in place in the new house, I feel my spirit coming home.

Isn’t life like that sometimes?  The ultimate goal of spirit, faith, a path, is to be at center even in the midst of the mess.  I wish I could say that I was there, but I am not.  Ask any of those who were around me in this process and they will tell you the disjointed, different person I was. Yet, again, isn’t that so often the case with us?  That being said, life gets messy sometimes and our hearts seek home – a place of equilibrium – good “fung shui.”

No matter how disjointed I felt in the midst of this process though, I knew that at the end of the road home awaited.  I suppose that’s a good thing to remember in the midst of the messes that can befall us in life.  In the midst of it, no matter how disjointed we feel – know that in the end, home awaits.

Even as my spirit settles into this new physical space that I will call home, I am aware that on this side of life we live in a mess, disjointed, our hearts seeking equilibrium.  “Our hearts are restless until they rest in thee” said St. Augustine.  Our hearts so fear the end of this life.  Yet, I wonder if, when being born into the next life we will discover the ultimate place of equilibrium and our hearts will finally feel like we’ve come home?  That’s our hope.  And the good news is this, we can begin to taste eternal equilibrium now.