Category Archives: Love


OK, now that I have your attention . . .

It’s true. I really do want lots of sex – but not just the hot, passionate, genital kind.

I’m re-reading a book by Ron Rolheiser called The Holy Longing: The Search For a Christian Spirituality. In it, he has a great chapter on sexuality. I’d like to quote one of his definitions of sexuality:

“Sexuality is an all encompassing energy inside of us. In one sense, it is identifiable with the principle of life itself. It is the drive for love, communion, community, friendship, family, affection, wholeness, consummation, creativity, self-perpetuation, immortality, joy, delight, humor and self-transcendence (p.194).”

That’s the kinda sex I want! It’s about being connected on a wide variety of levels. It’s about connection and creativity, about living life fully!

I find that some, even me (yes me, can you believe it?? LOL!) collapse the totality of what sexuality is into simply its genital expression. Over indulgence in porn or sex has the potential of actually sapping our life energy, instead of adding to it. It can leave us empty and only half a person. Instead of feeling more connected to life, we can end up feeling separate and alone. Ultimately we seek connection – that sense of eternity and wholeness we once had before we were born into this physical universe. And on this side of life, we seek and find this wholeness in creative energies, art, music, friendship, family, solitude, life giving work and self giving love. It is when I am balanced on lots of these levels that I feel the most whole and horny – in a healthy, life giving way.

So I say, bring it on baby! That’s the kinda sex I want – and I want LOTS of it!

Make It Smooth

“Make straight in the wasteland a highway for our God! Every valley shall be filled in, every mountain and hill will be made low. The rugged land shall be made a plain, the rough country, a broad valley.” (See Isaiah 40: 1-11)

We’re so used to good roads in the United States that the concept of making a straight highway and leveling mountains is lost on us. When I lived in Central America for a summer I came to appreciate the roads and highway system we have here unlike I ever have before.

This concept of making a highway for God comes up again and again during Advent. If you’ve had the opportunity to observe a highway being built through hills and mountains, suddenly the awesome task of making a straight road comes into perspective!

This makes me think about the obstacles and “rough places” that are still within me, or the obstacles that I either place in another’s way, or don’t help remove. Think of your partner at home, or another family member or friend. Think of the poor, the less fortunate. How could I be of help in removing some of the obstacles that people have in their lives and making life even a little bit easier for them? And, conversely, what rough places and obstacles are still within me that hinder me from living life just a little more fully?

What’s Most Important?

Luke 21: 5-11

What we see, this life, is not all there is or will be! Today’s readings speak to that strongly. All that we see in this life is passing. It will not always exist. If you have ever been to Rome you have seen the wonderful ruins from the Roman Empire. They are an incredible sight to behold! I’m sure in their day, the Romans thought that what they had would ALWAYS exist, would always be. In our own day, certainly in our own country, we cannot imagine life being different from what we have today. Who could ever imagine that our beautiful capital building and monuments in Washington DC would one day just be ruins?

In this last week of the year, when we continue to hear of the “end times,” we are encouraged to consider the passing nature of things. Two things come to mind. One is, . . . “carpe diem!” Seize the day! LIVE life to its full! Really drink in the wonder of each day and be grateful! The other thing that comes to mind is, . . . in what am I investing my time and energy? Is the focus of my life and my attention an investment in “things?” If it is, my focus is not where it should be. “Things” will pass away. They are temporary. But if I am investing my time in people, then my focus is in the right place. For, unlike “things,” love is eternal! It will never pass away. The investment that I make in people will live on forever! And when it is all said and done, what will matter most to us in the time of our own transition from this life to the next will not be the things we’ve had, but the difference we have made in the lives of others.

Obama’s Dog. What We Can Learn.

 Today I saw a few more headlines about the Obama’s search for a dog to come with them to the White House. I find it amazing how much press this dog is getting and indeed how much it will get once chosen! And you know what? That dog will have NO IDEA how important, well known, famous and powerful a family it will have become a part of. It will simply love unconditionally, totally blind to human judgement.

If the dog for some reason would need to be taken out of the White House and given to another family – say, a poor family – it would be blind to the difference in surroundings, the difference in the economis status or importance of the family that it is now living with. It would simply continue to offer love.

Perhaps we all could learn something from our canine friends. Perhaps we could all benefit from removing the filters of judgement ingrained in us and become blind to the differences in people. I know that I would do well to become more like a dog. God knows that I have filters of judgement within me of which I am not even aware; yet they are there. Perhaps today I could begin opening myself to a wider circle of people and, like a dog, welcome whoever walks into the path of my life, no matter their appearance, economic status, belief system, political persuasion, etc.




“We have done no more than our duty.” (Luke 17: 10)

 Sometimes love is like that. Sometimes life is like that. It’s not a matter of how we “feel,” or whether or not we’re excited about doing something for someone. Sometimes life and love is just about doing something good WHEN WE DON’T WANT TO, when we DON’T feel like it. In that, one’s love is proven.

Do something for someone today – even though you don’t feel like it.

Building Temples

In Catholic circles the dedication of a church building is celebrated today – the dedication of the Cathedral church of Rome – St. John Lateran.

Such a feast strikes me as very bizarre!  Why have a feast celebrating a building?  After all, buildings will crumble, buildings come and go.  Yet on the other hand, there is something to be said for “sacred space.”  That space could be within a building for some, and in the Cathedrals of forests and mountains for others.  The fact is, in the noisy, frenzied society in which we live, the need for sacred space becomes paramount.  We all need a place to go where we can be silent, renewed and refreshed, whether that be within the walls of a building, our homes or in nature.

What’s curious to me in this feast is that the readings suggested don’t so much point to the building of a temple.  In the end, does God really care about all these temples and monuments built to Her/His name??  I don’t think so.  The Scripture readings speak of the temple that you and I are and the importance of caring for that temple and building up the body that we are as humans.  It is about building bridges of forgiveness and love between peoples and nations.  It is about caring for our own body temples and our minds.  It is about building up one other in love, reaching beyond our comfort zones at times to care for the lonely, the lost, the hurting.  This is what it means to building a temple pleasing to God.

So, how well am I caring for the temple that is my body?  How am I contributing to the building up of those who are in need?

How Are You Behaving?

Exodus 22: 20-26

Matthew 22: 34-40

Notice in Matthew that a scholar of the law posed the question as to which commandment is the greatest, after he found out that Jesus had silenced the Sadducees.  He posed it as a test.  But notice what Jesus does.  He speaks to the great commandment, the great “Hear O Israel, . . . you shall love the Lord your God with your whole heart, soul and mind”  But then Jesus combines this commandment with another:  “You shall love your neighbor as yourself.”  Then he says that the WHOLE LAW is summed up in these commandments.  Again, I imagine, the scholar of the law sat silent, unable to contest what Jesus had said.

In Exodus as well as elsewhere, what it means to love is spelled out.  Our love of God is to be reflected in our love of others.  As a matter of fact, even if someone says they don’t believe in God, but they exhibit love and care for others, they, in fact, are headed in the right direction.

Is the love that I claim to have for God reflected in my actions?  If someone didn’t know anything of my “spirituality,” but only observed my behavior – would my spirituality be evident in my actions?  Francis of Assisi said:  “Preach the Gospel. . . . And when necessary, use words!”

How am I behaving today?